literature

Cross Me Off Your List -MXM-

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Literature Text

Matt's POV

~
So let us,
Concentrate,
On all those things,
You love to hate.
~

I stared blankly into his eyes, he stared right back. I still don't understand your reasons. I don't want to, so just listen to me once.

~
It makes this,
All worth the wait,
But causes us,
To separate.
~

Ironic how we were right back to our staring again. Only now he was half dead and his eyes were bright with an untamed fear; Mello didn't want to die. But I knew that we would never be the same around each other. It made me want to not help him, but I knew that would make things worse.

~
And I don't know,
How I should feel,
These lights make it all seem real.
~

I stared at the unconscious blonde, just stared. This wasn't really happening.

~
Can you see this?
Or wear it on your wrist?
It's everything you wanted,
The mark you always missed.
~

The strange part was that I felt nothing anymore. No direct contact with people does that to you, it numbs you. It turns you into a machine. But apparently, in Mello's case, too much contact did the same.

~
Can you feel this?
Cross me off your list,
She's everything you wanted,
The mark you always missed.
~

I was done caring, it was just over. Obviously Mello wanted another machine just like him. I wasn't that machine. I was a different type. Like he was a Macbook Pro and I was a Nintendo 64. Not compatible.

~
With dry eyes,
Steady hands,
I try so hard to understand,
~

This was giving me such a head ache. Mello was trying to change me into his ideal machine, trying to upgrade me, but Mello was horrible with technology. I had a better chance of downgrading him. But I wouldn't.

"If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours."

~
Why you left us,
All alone,
Three broken hearts with a broken home.
~

Slowly my new ice heart was melting, but it revealed something Mello didn't want to see. He tried to re-freeze it, only to have it melt completely. To him, what good was a wounded soldier, even if that wound was emotional.

~
And I don't know,
How I should feel,
These lights make it all seem real.
~

The pain was surprisingly bearable. As the bullets tore through blood, flesg and bone, I was eerily at ease. Not really minding my fall, if you could call it that. It's not as though I wasn't already at rock bottom.

~
Can you see this?
Or wear it on your wrist?
It's everything you wanted,
The mark you always missed.
~

I contemplated many things as I laid bleeding, noticing how no one helped me. After my life experience, I wasn't sure if I wanted help. I just watched as they stared at me. Wondering how stupid I was, or if I were suicidal. If only they knew.

~
Can you see this?
Or wear it on your wrist?
~

My thoughts turned to Mello, I wondered if he cared, even a little. And as my cigarette fell from my lips, I wasn't sure I'd ever know.

~
It's everything you wanted,
The mark you always missed.
~

"Please forgive me, Matt. I never thought you'd die."

~
Can you feel this?
Cross me off your list,
She's everything you wanted,
The mark you always missed.
~
So this is a wedding present for my wife MXMsHolic =D She's already read it, and apperently it's sad >.< Gah, can I not write a happy peice of fanfiction?? According to my aunt, this means I'm a "Romantic"... I was like "O_O Okay..." So, yeah, MXM goodness, I MAY make a sequel from Mello's POV. Which was what I was TRYING to write during NAF... There were suppose to be two, but the other one just wouldn't come!

BTW, the song is "Cross Me Off Your List" by Hawthorne Heights. =D
© 2010 - 2024 BeyondsWaraNingyo
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